Book #2: Don't Make Me Count to Three

Last night I finished my second book of 2011 -- Don't Make Me Count to Three by Ginger Plowman. I read it when Clara was a baby and I liked it then. Now that she is two I thought it would be helpful to read it again. It's a quick read - only 133 pages of very practical information. If you've read Shepherding a Child's Heart you'll probably like Don't Make Me Count to Three. I feel like Shepherding talks about the big idea of how to discipline your children and Don't Make Me Count to Three talks about how to practically carry it out.

One of her main points is that it's not enough to address the behavior...you have to also address the heart that's behind the behavior. And it's not enough to communicate that something was wrong...you have to also teach them what would have been right behavior in that situation.

Dealing with sin in our young children many times every day it can be easy to take the quickest route and just spank or give a time out and say "that was naughty." This book was a great reminder and encouragement to me to take the extra couple minutes and help Clara (and soon Lola) to understand why she was being naughty and how God feels about that and what He expects from her in the future.

She lists some traps to avoid when disciplining our kids...

- Repeating yourself - I totally do this, but it trains our kids not to obey the first time.

- Raising your voice

- Worldly techniques, such as counting to three. "Children will rise to the standard that the parents set."

- Tolerating small acts of disobedience - yep, I do this because I get so weary of training

Another thing she said that stood out to me is that she would ask her kids "How does God want you to obey?" And she taught them to say "Right away, all the way, and with a happy heart." That seems like a good mantra to me. And this is important because learning to obey their parents is a step toward learning to obey God. God expects our obedience to be right away, all the way and with a happy heart.

Okay, that's my book review. I do own this book and I'm happy to lend it out. Now I'm moving on to Professionalizing Motherhood. I'm several chapters into it (they're short chapters) and I'm liking it already.